Broke a promise delibrately to anger or upset someone isn’t realli making urself feel much better

How long was my last update?? Haiz, nevermind, tat isn’t important… I had upsets with Turtle again… dunno is I too sensitive or stick to him or wad… Supposedly to meet today, but last night Penguin told me that the gang meeting for dinner i think, I know Turtle didn’t know bcuz if not he wouldn’t have ask me out the next day… but if i dun tell him, I feel bad about not letting meet his friends… Also, my fault for not getting along well with his friends, stuff they talk about I know nothing not a single thing… I do admit that I feel very much left out like I’m in fish tank looking outside ppl who r looking at me… Fish Tank is like a barrier from me to the surrounding… I went swimming around Orchard, Bugis, Amk Mo Kio today, buying stuff tat I need for my device from Studio Project… Bought Turtle’s most favourite cake from Bakerzin… Thought of juz dropping by to pass him the cake to cheer him up from his long cough torture… Turtle told me tat he’s at Bugis… I went there bcuz I couldn’t find a A3 photocopier, at the same time to pass him the cake… After I reached, Penguin told me that he aren’t joining the gang for dinner and Turtle told him to accompany me at Ang Mo Kio while he coming… I msg Turtle, he said that he on the way back to Ang Mo Kio, so I head back to Ang Mo Kio… but when I reached, he msg me that he going to Korean Fan’s house to get some nero disc… Ask me to head back home… Not having a single thing in my stomach for the whole day was quite uncomfort… plus the afternoon sun gave me headach for the whole day… Mood realli jump down from 100th stories down… Went back home alone, and I threw the cake along the way… Feels so bad that I deliberately find Dragon to talk since he have been sending mails for the past few months… I do feel bad till now, and drop by a msg in msn to inform him i’m alright… Tat’s all… Turtle, I think he quite abit upset or even angry when he knew… Haiz… nvm… I’m a bad girl afterall… I can never be an angel to anyone… Devil more to everyone… Who knows maybe one day bcuz of my own actions I crush this relationship with a sad ending with my very own hands…

Tears wouldn\'t appear though inside is crushing

~ by Shiruetto on May 16, 2008.

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